Are You Two Just Friends? Emotional and Sexual Infidelity Across Sexual Orientations
Keywords:
infidelity, relationships, sexuality, friendship
Abstract
Lesbians are unlikely to ask if it is possible for women and women to be friends. Bisexuals have friends of each sex. It seems that it is primarily heterosexuals who have trouble with sex-of-attraction friendships. This study examined how participants perceived the emotional and sexual infidelity of their partner’s relationship with a friend differing across sexuality and biological sex. Our participants consisted of a combined sample across two studies (n = 532), participants completed measures of their perceived emotional and sexual infidelity towards 10 controlled behaviors that their partners committed with the partner’s friends. The data revealed that participants were more concerned with perceived emotional infidelity with sex(es)-of-attraction friends as a function of participants’ sexual orientation, sex, and their lover’s sexual orientation. Our evidence shows that when in relationships, people feel most threatened by the friend of the partner who possesses the same biological machinery as them. Furthermore, results suggest that people are also more likely to be threatened by their partner’s friend, who may have a mutual attraction towards their partner. The effect of the same biological machinery and the mutual attraction on perceived infidelity is additive. The pattern is seen across heterosexual, homosexual, and bisexual relationships.
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Frederick, D. A., & Fales, M. R. (2016). Upset over sexual versus emotional infidelity among gay, lesbian, bisexual, and heterosexual adults. Archives of sexual behavior, 45(1), 175-191. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10508-014-0409-9
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Gillespie, B. J., Frederick, D. A., Harari, L., & Grov, C. (2015). Homophily, close friendship, and life satisfaction among gay, lesbian, heterosexual, and bisexual men and women. PLoS One, 10, e0128900. Doi: https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0128900
Gleason, N., Vencill, J. A., & Sprankle, E. (2018). Swipe left on the bi guys: Examining attitudes toward dating and being sexual with bisexual individuals. Journal of Bisexuality, 18(4), 516-534. https://doi.org/10.1080/15299716.2018.1563935
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Gulledge, A. K., Stahmann, R. F., & Wilson, C. M. (2004). Seven types of nonsexual romantic physical affection among Brigham Young University students. Psychological Reports, 95(2), 609–614. https://doi.org/10.2466/pr0.95.2.609-614
Harris, C. R. (2000). Psychophysiological responses to imagined infidelity: The specific innate modular view of jealousy reconsidered. Journal of personality and social psychology, 78(6), 1082. https://doi.org/10.1037//0022-3514.78.6.1082
Harris, C. R. (2003a). A review of sex differences in sexual jealousy, including self-report data, psychophysiological responses, interpersonal violence, and morbid jealousy. Personality and Social Psychology Review, 7(2), 102–128. https://doi.org/10.1207%2FS15327957PSPR0702_102-128
Haupert, M. L., Gesselman, A. N., Moors, A. C., Fisher, H. E., & Garcia, J. R. (2017). Prevalence of experiences with consensual nonmonogamous relationships: Findings from two national samples of single Americans. Journal of sex & marital therapy, 43(5), 424-440. https://doi.org/10.1080/0092623X.2016.1178675
Hoang, M., Holloway, J., & Mendoza, R. H. (2011). An empirical study into the relationship between bisexual identity congruence, internalized biphobia and infidelity among bisexual women. Journal of Bisexuality, 11(1), 23-38. https://doi.org/10.1080/15299716.2011.545285
Howard, R. M., & Perilloux, C. (2017). Is mating psychology most closely tied to biological sex or preferred partner's sex?. Personality and Individual Differences, 115, 83-89. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2016.05.009
Hughes, S. M., Harrison, M. A., & Gallup, G. G. (2004). Sex differences in mating strategies: Mate guarding, infidelity and multiple concurrent sex partners. Sexualities, Evolution & Gender, 6(1), 3-13. http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/14616660410001733588
Jordal, C. (2011). "Making it Work": A Grounded Theory of How Mixed Orientation Married Couples Commit, Sexually Identify, and Gender Themselves. (Doctoral dissertation). Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University, Blacksburg, VA. http://hdl.handle.net/10919/27664
Kleven, H., Landais, C., & Søgaard, J. E. (2021). Does biology drive child penalties? evidence from biological and adoptive families. American Economic Review: Insights, 3(2), 183-98.https://doi.org/10.1257/aeri.20200260
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